How did baseball survive over two months without a Boston/New York match-up? It’s barely a rivalry these days as the Yankees took an 8 1/2 game lead over the Red Sox with the big win last night. It was your typical NY/BOS game, i.e., nearly 4 hours long, 18 runs scored, 28 hits, and plenty of dirty looks and “bad calls.” One thing we can always count on in these match-ups is plenty of fantasy implications; in fact, I was debating even covering the other games.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Phils decided they wanted to get younger for Friday’s game so they’re bringing up this guy from the minors. They say he’s got good power, but he’s been playing first base on a foot stool. At least they could’ve got Ryan Howard one of those giant Rawlings glove bean bags.Please, blog, may I have some more?
“That guy looks vaguely familiar.” ”Which guy?” ”That guy on the mound.” ”The Chris Tillman fella?” ”Yeah.” ”Did he used to serve us coffee at the Blue Danube?” ”I don’t think so. That guy’s name was Ronnie. And he had dreads.” ”But he was white.” ”Yeah, Ronnie was a white guy with dreads.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Tim Lincecum has a 6.07 ERA. Seriously, we’re in July and Lincecum’s ERA is six point oh seven. There’s ugly. There’s brutal. There’s murderous. There’s the guy with the goiter down the street from you that you talked to at a red light once and now he wants to hang out.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Pirates announced the time is nigh for Starling Marte. The Pirates equipment manager, Buffalo Bill, has to start making a uniform made from Jose Tabata’s skin. Put the lotion in the basket, Tabata! Tabata, “I wanna go home!” You won’t go home, ever.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yasmani Grandal is starring in an off-off Broadway production of OBPwulf. Since everyone was supposed to read Beowulf, but no one has actually ever read it, the play starts with Grandal standing on first after a walk, and then he stands there and stands there and stands there, waiting for another Padre hitter to get him to 2nd base.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Chicago White Sox started a three game series with the Yankees last night and came up with a huge win. Jose Quintana pitched 6.0 innings, gave up 8 hits, 6 ER, 5 Ks, and got the win. As far as starts at Yankee Stadium go, this one could have been a lot worse.Please, blog, may I have some more?
As David Brent’s friend would say, “Only one for the Bum, no harm done.” Madison Bumgarner got SF another SHO as he threw a game that made it easy to get behind the Bum and not just for those in The Castro — 9 IP, 0 ER, 1 Hit, 2 walks and 8 Ks.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yankee pitchers haven’t been hit this hard since Ed Whitson ran into a Billy Martin drinking jag. You know, Yogi’s always the one quoted from the Yankee archives, but Billy had some good ones too. Here’s my favorite, “I’d like to mouth f*** that bottle of whiskey.” Before the Yankees game, CC Sabathia hit the DL with an abductor strain in his groin. Someone’s got clams! CC is supposed to be fine to go right after the All-Star break, as long as no one else tries to shuck his groin. Then, once the game got going, Andy Pettitte was hit in the ankle with a comebacker. Pettitte is supposed to be out for 6-8 weeks. At least he didn’t pull a Zumaya during his retirement and hurt himself playing Guitar Hero (or, more likely, Guitar Praise). The Yankees’ rotation now has plenty of room for anyone the Cubs, Astros, Padres or Brewers want to give trade them. I did the crossed out text thing, I’m a jerkoff! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Daniel Hudson – Torn UCL.Please, blog, may I have some more?
In a Hudson vs. Hudson battle, Tim won on a technicality as Daniel Hudson left the game with what seemed to be a forearm injury. To add insult to injury, he left the game after giving up 5 ER on 7 hits in 1 2/3 IP. With a ghastly 7.35 ERA in 45 IP this year, injury or not, it’s time to cut Daniel Hudson from mixed leagues. He looked primed to build upon a solid 2011 but so did Kate Hudson after Almost Famous. Let’s just hope Daniel doesn’t wake up to find Alex Rodriguez in his bed, begging him to go blonder and to tone up his arms. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jason Kubel – 1-for-4 with his 2nd homer in as many games. Hey, Code Rossi wants back his fantasy outfielder value! Kubel has 4 homers this week and is hitting .333. May not be a long-term solution, but I’d give him the ol’ how’s your father? Even if his last name sounds like a vaginal exercise.Please, blog, may I have some more?