Dan Uggla has now homered in two straight games, but, more importantly, he has two other hits in those games, making him hotter than a junebug on a duck’s back or some other yokelism they say in The South.  That’s at least compared to how he looked like Rocky Dennis on all his swings prior to this week. 

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Sounds like Ike Davis is done for the year.  He could be facing microfracture ankle surgery.  Man, will the Mets ever catch a big break?  First, Beltran had microfracture surgery on his knee, and now Davis.  What’s with the Mets and tiny surgery? 

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The other day I was feeling tired but not tired like I could sleep but tired like I wanted to lie in bed and have Rudy read me a bedtime story.  So here’s what Rudy read to me, “Once upon a time, a very long time ago now, about last Friday, Neftali Feliz was the best closer in the major leagues. 

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Cliff Lee aka The Adverb got through the Gnats like a subject and a predicate.  Pitches so sharp, Lee will cut your head off.  Selig is the commissioner.  You no wanna start Leezy, he is the Finisher.  Stop playin’, he do it like a King do. 

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Manny Ramirez was involved in a trade.  The drug trade!  Many people move to Florida to retire.  Manny just decided to do them in a slightly different order.  Manny said of the sudden retirement, “I’m at ease.  I’m now an officially retired baseball player. 

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Now’s the time when we put all of our 2011 baseball predictions in one place.  Then in October we can look back at this and laugh.  Oh, and we will laugh.  Big, bellowing, seat of your pants laughs.  Hindsight is indeed 20/20. 

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Jose Bautista hit his 39th and 40th home runs last night.  As frequent commenter, VinWins, pointed out yesterday, in the Blue Kays last 162 games, Bautista has 50 homers.  Okay, I was way off with this guy, but Jose Bautista didn’t see this year coming. 

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Almost a 11 K/9 in the minors is, uh, Mike Minor.  He major, Kanye.  I hope Roberto Kelly doesn’t come back to visit the Braves because when R. Kelly sees a minor, urine trouble!  So should you play some Gary Glitter if you’re lusting after this Minor? 

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Chris Davis is so easy to strike out that pitchers should let him get a 4th or 5th strike like you’d give the small-for-his-age kid in little league.  “Good cut, Chris!”  Then the parent who needs anger management screams, “It’s on a freakin’ tee! 

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Someone’s getting comped at the Tampa Airport Hooters!  Matt Garza threw the Rays first no-hitter yesterday.  He hypnotized the Tigers with the Garza Strip on his chin.  With all due respect to Ernie Harwell, the EH on the Tigers uniform could easily refer to the lineup without Ordonez and Guillen. 

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