Hey dads, hope you had a great Father’s Day barbecuing with your kids. If you don’t have kids, hope you had a great day barbecuing with your dad. If you don’t have kids or a dad, hope you had a great day with tons of barbecued food.

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Oakland Athletics: After surrendering 3 baserunners and 3 runs in a blown save Friday, Brian Fuentes is out of the 9th in Oakland. He no longer misses bats; he owns a solid 9.38 career K/9 with a 11.3% swinging strike rate, but his 2012 numbers check in at a much less impressive 6.45 K/9, supported by a diminished 7.0% swinging strike rate.

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Don’t pay for steals. Why? Because they can be found on the wire during the season. As an example, the leaders in stolen bases, from 2009-2011:

Michael Bourn – 174
Carl Crawford – 125
Juan Pierre – 125
Mystery Man – 125
Brett Gardner – 122

Brett Gardner hasn’t played since April 17, isn’t expected back until after the All-Star break, and is owned in nearly 81% of ESPN leagues and 68% of Yahoo leagues; Mystery Man is owned in just over 7% of ESPN leagues, 9% of Yahoo leagues.

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New York Yankees: On Friday, Jon Heyman reported that Rafael Soriano will remain the closer, even after David Robertson returns from his oblique injury in a week or two. I was a little harsh in my assessment of Soriano two weeks ago, as his May K/BB was a solid 3.67, vastly superior to his awful 1.17 ratio in April.

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By this point of the season, most useful players are owned. Alejandro De Aza types were gone by the third week in April, assuming they weren’t drafted by a savvy owner. Guys like Dexter Fowler are gone too, even if they’re close to useless in half of their games (.290 AVG, .885 OPS at home, .239 AVG, .684 OPS on the road).

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Seattle Mariners: After surrendering 6 ER and 13 baserunners in 4 appearances, Brandon League is out as the closer in Seattle. His 13/12 K/BB is not going to cut it, and his 7.6% swinging strike rate and career-worst 45.8% zone percentage don’t offer much hope moving forward.

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Sometimes an intro just isn’t necessary, and occasionally a picture really is worth 100 words:

Featuring a face not even his mother could love is this week’s Creeper, Colby Rasmus. Owned in 38% of ESPN leagues and 31% of Yahoo leagues, Rasmus and the Blue Jays are slated for six games in week 9, all at the Rogers Centre, with five of those coming against right-handed pitchers.

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Washington Nationals: Another turn on the closerousel for the Nationals, as Henry Rodriguez is no longer taking the ball in the 9th. BiBi showed the world on Wednesday that Davey Johnson was wrong for demoting him by allowing a homerun and walking a batter without recording a K.

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Location, location, location. Location determines balls and strikes, the weather, housing value, and it can even turn Carlos Gonzalez (.262/.316/.427 on the road) into Ken Griffey Jr. (.329/.384/.609 at home). Personally, I dig California. You’re never far from a beach, a mountain range, or a desert.

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Jesus Hamilton Christ, has anyone ever been that hot? After contributing a .467 AVG with 9 HR and 18 RBI this last week, if you Hamilton owners somehow managed to lose your matchup I feel bad for you son, you got 99 problems and a bitch ass offense is one of them.

Please, blog, may I have some more?