One quick note, our War Room guy from last year has dropped out, so if you guys (maybe four girls) want a War Room this year, someone needs to step up to make it happen. I will take ready, willing and abled-bodied people in the comments. Oh, who are we kidding, no one here is able-bodied! I’ll take anyone, just comment and I’ll contact you. This is for the downloadable Excel War Room. Any hoo! With the top 80 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball, we are so close to the end of the rankings I can almost taste it! Wait, that’s not rankings I taste, I bit my lip and it’s blood. I wonder if when Dracula bites his lip it’s like when Cougs goes out with her friends and I’m left at home while Emmanuelle is on Cinemax. You might say to yourself, “Self, everyone is totally fooled by my toupee and do I really need to draft starters this deep in my friendly 12-team mixed league?” You don’t, except you will own guys from this post this year either from the draft or from waivers or your leaguemates will own them and beat you. Last year, in the tier of pitchers I liked in the top 80 starters was Aaron Sanchez (pitcher, not chef), Rich Hill (pitcher, not sniglets) and Tanner Roark (pitcher, not Tattoo’s boss). If you owned just them, you had a 2.74 ERA in 512 1/3 IP. You really still think you need starters drafted early? You throw in two earlier starters, say, Kluber and Gausman, and you have way too much pitching now. I’ll go over exactly how to draft starters in a few days, but there are so many ways to skin a cat we should have PETA breathing down our necks. All the 2017 fantasy baseball rankings are there. My tiers and projections are noted. Anyway, here’s the top 80 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
To paraphrase Tupac from Brenda’s Got a Baby, “I hear Grey’s got 2017 fantasy baseball rankings, but Grey’s barely got a brain. A damn shame. That guy can hardly spell his name. GREY’S….GOT EM….RANKINGS! Don’t you know he’s got ’em. He wrote them solo, and he wrote them on his bathroom floor and didn’t know what to throw away and what to keep. He crumbled these rankings up and threw them in a trash heap. GREY’S….GOT EM….RANKINGS! Don’t you know he’s got ’em.” Don’t say I don’t keep my shizz socially conscious. Or is it socially conscience? Meh, doesn’t matter, I do it either way. So, this top 60 starters has seven pitchers I’m not crazy about. That’s more than the last post, but still not that many. I.e., there’s a ton of starters to draft. As with previous rankings posts, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 60 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The 2017 fantasy baseball rankings are under that link. Why are you lifting your computer? Not literally under that link! Okay, you’re thick like a CVS receipt folded in half twelve times. In years past, the top 40 starters is a mix of guys I like and don’t like. Like a high cholesterol cow, it’s about half and half. This year, I really had to struggle to find guys that I didn’t want to draft in the top 40 starters. In the end, there were five starters in this top 40 starter post I was less okay, and more amscray. Each fantasy team needs about six starters total, so tell me again why you need to draft starters early? There’s a ton of them, like, this is simple math. So, simple, there’s no actual number and just ‘a ton.’ As with past rankings, my tiers and projections are included for the low, low price of $19.99! Kidding, they’re free. The oxygen you need to live while reading them is gonna cost you though. Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The royal we already went over all the hitters for 2017 fantasy baseball rankings. That’s not the “royal we” as that term usually implies. It was me writing it alone while wearing a Burger King crown. I refuse to draft a top starter where they are usually drafted. Unlike hitters, you need six starters, depending on your league depth. Simple math tells us there’s plenty of starters to go around. Simple Math also says, “Stop putting words in my mouth!” In most leagues, there’s a ton of pitchers on waivers that can help you — all year. Not just in April, and then they disappear. With the help of the Stream-o-Nator, you can get by with, say, three starters while streaming the rest. There’s also the fact that three stats by starters are difficult to predict due to luck. Wins, ERA and WHIP are prone to shift due to which way the ball bounces and whether or not the guys behind the pitchers can score runs. Finally, the best starters can give you four categories. The best hitters can give you five categories. As always, where I see tiers starting and stopping are included and my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I stopped doing the top 5 designated hitters a few years ago because there was only one guy, Papi Grande, that was only eligible at DH that was worth discussing. Then last year happened, and Ron Blomberg finally had something to talk about again at the bingo hall. “If you wanna sit by your bingo cards while I come in and hit them with the marker for you, I can do that.” That’s Blomberg keeping his DH muscles on the ready. Now, this year, with Big Papi retired and Sano having a position, this post again feels irrelevant, but what the hey! All of the 2017 fantasy baseball rankings are under that rather self-explanatory link. As with all other posts, I say when tiers start and stop and give you my projections. If you want, here’s the 2017 position eligibility chart that doesn’t contain any of the guys in this post. Anyway, here’s the top 5 designated hitters for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yasmany Tomas, Odubel Herrera, Nomar Mazara. What do those players have in common? Guys that were in last year’s top 100 outfielders post that made it out like this is Orange is the New Black and those guys were Taystee. Only then Taystee got reincarcerated and brought with her that badass b*tch Vee, and Vee then started running shizz and that white ho, who the show was originally about that is annoying AF, started getting institutionalized with panty-selling and lez ho’ing and–Well, anyway, you get the point. There’s not a ton of sunshine in this top 100 outfielders, but occasionally you do get glimmers of hope. All the 2017 fantasy baseball rankings are under that link-ma-whosie. As always, my projections and tiers are included. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
As we continue our 2017 fantasy baseball rankings, we head into the homestretch of ranking hitters. For those confused, homestretch isn’t when you shoot up late at night, remembering there’s a Dorito under the couch and go reaching for it. That is the opening to my short film, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dorito. The main character has just been Frito-Laid off and is described as Pringley and Ruffled. Last year, this post had Adam Duvall, Jackie Bradley Junz, Jay Brucespringsteen and a bunch of vomit. So, there is some value to still be found in the outfielders, it’s just a matter of finding it, like in the landmark film, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dorito. As with the other rankings, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 80 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’ve decided to do something different for this top 60 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball. Instead of listing the players’ names, I’m going to list their favorite cheese course: Muenster, Cheddar, Cheddar, Cheddar, Swiss, Gruyere. Gruyere?! C’mon, Puig! Maybe I should go back to listing players’ names. Yeah, I don’t even remember who Limburger was. Fine! I will rank with names and numbers! As with all of my 2017 fantasy baseball rankings, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 60 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
We’re taking these outfielders to 120 total, so this should still be the beginning of wonderful for you, but as you look down this list, guys like Matt Kemp become more attractive and not just if you’re an R&B singer. Rap is not pop, if you call it that then stop. I’m going aggressive for guys like Kepler and Piss-hotty (sounds like watersports, right, Mr. President?), because the alternative is dank with excitement. Stephen Hawking’s hitting his keyboard robotically telling us, “It’s a black hole for outfielders, we need to spontaneously combust some new ones.” Then Stephen jots down a letter to Eddie Redmayne about a sequel to The Theory of Everything; Eddie’s got a binder of these letters. As always, my projections are noted for each player and where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
In an incredible turn of events, I’ve done all the infield 2017 fantasy baseball rankings. Less incredible, you’ve read them all. It’s like that time your favorite team won because they played better than that other team but you convinced yourself they won because you cheered loudly. When I win the Fantasy Baseball Blogger of the Millennial in 2099, and my frozen head is accepting the award, I’m going to thank you, the readers, but I’m secretly going to be thanking myself. Without me, none of this would be possible. You’re a close second though! Okay, enough ranking you and me, let’s rank some outfielders! Last year, there was one outfielder I said I didn’t want in the top 20, Andrew McClutchin’ His Knee. This year, well, let’s save it for the post! All my projections are listed by the players and where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 20 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?