Who Knew?  Apparently, everyone.  I may have been the only one rooting for Aaron Heilman; Lou definitely was not.  Well, open that window and throw Heilman out.  Sean Marshall has been named the Cubs fifth starter.  As I said somewhere in the comments in the last couple of days, I like whoever comes away with the 5th starter job for the Cubs. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Because Casey Kotchman is most noteworthy (in my eyes) for having the longest known case of mononucleosis, it makes sense he’d be considered a sleeper.  Only, not necessarily, a fantasy baseball sleeper.  More like a Prince Valium one.  After the trade to the Braves last year, Casey Kotchman hit 2/20/.237. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Remember the blonde chick from the The Real World:  Hawaii, who, like, totally fell for Colin?  She was the cute girl with the young grandmother body.  You know who I’m talking about?  Cool.  Yeah, she’s not Kendry Morales.  Kendry Morales is the doode that the Angels are putting in as their starting 1st baseman. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If you’re havin’ pitching problems I feel bad for you, son… I got 99 problems but pitching ain’t one…. Check the baseline out, uh-huh… Bounce wit it to my bro Ryan’s glove, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh, yeah… Can’t leave the hitters alone, the Nats need me… There’s a new Jay-Z in town and his name is Jordan Zimmermann.

Please, blog, may I have some more?