I was thinking the other day that Jason Heyward is so young that he doesn’t remember George Bush, Sr. being president. I mean, he’s heard of him (I think), but he was only 3-years-old when he left office. Amongst other things, Heyward missed John Travolta’s career downturn with talking babies, Sean Penn protecting Madonna, Timothy Dalton playing Bond and Billy Crystal as a leading man. Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Andres Torres went 2-for-4 with the delicious slam & legs.  My man has slams and legses for days!  This is his 2nd homer and 2nd steal since he’s returned from his appendectomy.  Somehow he’s a Latin 32, but he played this season like an Asian 52, which isn’t an official Razzball glossary term, but comes from my belief that all Asians look much younger until they hit 53-years-old then they look much older than they are.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I told you two days ago to own Justin Smoak in his series in Texas.  Three straight games, three homers.  To paraphrase Young MC from We’re All In The Same Gang, “I try my best to set an example, talkin’ up hyped players over hip-hop samples.”  (BTW, the M’s lost yesterday when the catcher went to complete a strikeout by throwing the ball to first for the final out in the ninth but the ball sailed into right field and allowed the runner on first to score.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yahoo’s fantasy baseball doesn’t count a one game playoff, no matter the format.  It would be the Keyser Söze of regular season games, I suppose.  ESPN, on the other hand, does count it.  So that means only one thing.  You need to pick up everyone from potential one game playoff teams before your leaguemates, if it could mean a championship for you.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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