Cornerstone, nay, cornerboulder, Prince Fielder is off to another yawnstipating start. Last year he hit 8 homers through the month of May. Boca Burgers were blamed last year, but maybe he just can’t swing a bat in cold weather because all he can think about is getting back to his hotel room and putting on his Snuggie. He’ll only be 25 in May and is still completely capable of 40 HRs on the year. If you can somehow wrestle Fielder away from an impatient owner, go for it (try a roofie!). Anyway, here’s some more players to buy and sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Jason Frasor – Newest victim of Scott Downs’ Syndrome? Maybe. Or maybe… Downs Goes… Frasor! Downs Goes… Frasor! Please, blog, may I have some more?
A rejected title was, “BJ Stands For Blown Job.” BJ Ryan was pronounced with a something-or-other injury to his something-or-other as he heads to the Disgraceful List. A’la Lili Taylor in Say Anything, “JP Ricciardi lies… He lies when he cries…” Ever see anything like this? JP Ricciardi always upgrades injury. Slight arm trouble = end of year surgery. God forbid Ricciardi ever says you need end of year surgery. Scott Downs will take over the bulk of the saves, but Jason Frasor will be right there in the mix. “Hey, Frasor, what are you doing there?” “I’m in the mix!” If someone in your league was quicker than you to grab Downs, grab Frasor. Downs goes… Frasor! Downs goes… Frasor! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Carlos Quentin – Left the game after getting hit on the hand. Supposedly just a day-to-day thing. Maybe Quentin could wear that forearm protector like Iron Mike Sharpe. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Always one to double check his Razzbill of sale to make sure he got everything he paid for, Razzball commenter Ron Mexico’s Papi saw my post yesterday about holding tight in your fantasy baseball leagues and flipped the script to ask me about selling high. Surely, if some guys should be held because they’re bound to revert to their old, productive selves then there must be guys who need to be sold off because there’s no way they can retain their torrid start. Yes, definitely. This is why I do a Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell every Friday, not a Buy/Buy. (Mr. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Francisco Liriano went four innings and gave up seven runs against a team that absolutely kills lefties in Fenway. Let’s run down his 3-year averages for the months of the season, starting with April: 6.93, 1.99, 1.51, 2.31, 1.13 and 4.36. You think he might need some time to get going? His April combined ERA for the last 3 years, not including this year, is almost 7. His combined May through August ERAs are under 2. Are you kidding me? Please, blog, may I have some more?
I already sort of covered this when I went over how you should not be dropping guys from your fantasy baseball team that you just drafted because they’re in a slump. Due to the amount of feedback that continues to come in about whether or not Chris Davis is worth more than Cristian Guzman (fill in any schmohawk name), I decided to cover the same topic again, but this time with examples. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ryan Doumit went from sleeper to 2nd tier fantasy catcher last year after he managed to take a year off from his Glass Joe impersonation that dogged him throughout 2006-2007 (2006 = 89 games missed w/ hamstring issues, 2007 = 26 games missed with wrist, and then 20 games with ankle). Actually, he missed 27 games last year with thumb (20), concussion ( 5 ) and the flu (two separate days), so even when he’s healthy he’s “merely a flesh wound” away from the DL. He’s now out for 8-10 weeks. Punt! (Or stash him on your DL if it’s empty.) I’d look at Baker, Salty, Shoppach or Hundley, all those names depend on league depth, of course. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Ian Stewart – Has played 5 games in OF (3 started). He’s 5 games played away from OF eligibility in Yahoo! Please, blog, may I have some more?
For owners bemoaning Al-Ram’s bad start, it could be worse. You could have Whore-Ram (Horacio Ramirez). (BTW, only fantasy baseball could convince a straight man that a Man-Ram is more preferable to a Whore-Ram. BTW II, How do you go from a Whore-Ram to a Man-Ram? An Ass-Cab (Asdrubal Cabrera).) Or you could have Ram-Ram. Please, blog, may I have some more?
And David Ortiz goes pop. For Patriots’ Day, the Sawx had a special throwback day where Varitek went yard, Pedroia acted like an MVP and David Ortiz acted less jenky than he had all season. Fulfilling their end of the bargain was Mark Hendrickson and the Orioles bullpen. *SCHMALTZ ALERT* Rudy and I went to college in Boston and Patriots’ Day was a time of general drunkenness as we mocked people who had just run the Boston Marathon all the way to Kenmore Square (about 25 miles). They may have been more fit than us, but at least our nipples weren’t bloody. R.I.P. Please, blog, may I have some more?
In yesterday’s game, Matt Kemp had 2 HRs and 5 RBIs. On the season, he’s batting .383 with 3 HRs, 14 RBIs, 12 Runs and 4 steals. The 7th spot in the order is killing his value like Daniel Craig killed the Bond series. Kemp’s a solid choice for NL MVP and I could see him moving to the 1st round next year for fantasy baseball drafts. He said in the preseason that he wanted to go 40/40. Can he actually do it? Like Chris Young, it’s a tall order. You don’t fall into 40/40 and, in Chavez Ravine, it’s not going to be easy for the 40 homers. But the fact he wants to steal 40 bases is telling. Steals are partially about motivation. Sometimes guys just don’t want to steal (see Krispie Young in ’08). Other times, players pile steals on to show they can (Canseco’s 40/40 year). I doubt Kemp reaches 40 homers, but 30/30 with a .300 average isn’t crackers. We shall call him Sizemoremore. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Glen Perkins – 8 IP, 1 ER. You’re talking about a pitching who had a 4.41 ERA last year, but a FIP (Fielding Independent Pitching) rate of 5.14. That’s pretty bad. Okay, I’m being generous. That’s awful. Yes, he was lucky to only have an ERA of 4.41. His MOLLY (Mitigating Of Lousy Loathsome Yuck) was 7. That means he got pretty lucky. So far this year his MOLLY is 9.9. His BABIP has been insanely lucky so far, his fly balls are all over the place yet falling into fielders’ gloves. He’s due for a regression. If you own him, you’re bound to get Mollywopped. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Robinson Cano? Please tell me you’re not going to suggest we buy into Robinson Cano? Please, Grey, I was beginning to find you halfway intelligent. Sorry, random italicized voice, I’m a glutton for punishment. Someone has a terrific season the previous year (Pedroia) and I pull back. A player craps the bed in the previous season (Robinson Cano) and I get excited about them. Please, blog, may I have some more?