This post is not meant to scream fire in the theater of Razzball.  I’m not saying don’t draft these guys.  I’m not unfriending them.  (I would hide all of their stupid Mafia Wars updates.  Okay, quick rant, I have a friend who emailed everyone that he just had a kid.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The murmurs of Heath Bell getting traded to another team by July are getting louder.  (BTW, I love the word murmurs.  I really wanted the survivors on Lost to call The Others, The Murmurs.  Wouldn’t that have been awesome?!  Okay, maybe me.)  Prepare for a dozen or so posts titled, “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” at some of our weak sister sites.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Okay, who put Jerry Blevins 498th?  He’s the greatest LOOGY of all-time… OF ALL-TIME.  Kanye shrug.  We’re using Yahoo for our Fantasy Razzball leagues. (You can win a mother-bleepin’ hot tub; are you kidding me?  Seriously.  Yes, I brought out the one word, “Seriously,” sentence, then brought out the expository sentence to mention I brought out the one word, “Seriously,” sentence.) Yahoo’s drafting and fantasy baseball team setup-ma-whosies is fine.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Between the two middle infield positions, I tend to draft a 2nd baseman early and punt shortstop.  This happens for a few reasons.  1) 2nd base has more talent.  That’s right, I draft the deeper position earlier.  Same reason I punt catchers and try to get a 1st baseman early.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Denard Dawg doesn’t seem to have a bad rap.  He has no rap.  Denard Span gets about as much press as fencing in the high school newspaper sports section.  Span’s in the shadow of everyone, not just his teammate, the 7-foot-1 Loek van Mil (who’s supposedly very TALLented).  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We all know Chone Figgins loves stealing 2nd base, but he might be starting early this year. After a brisk calisthenic session, Don Wakamatsu decided to try Figgy at 2nd base with Jose Lopez shifting to 3rd base.  The Mariners haven’t had this amount of speed at 2nd base since they faced David Eckstein and Ichiro moved up 50 steps.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?