Dogging Aramis Ramirez as someone who’s overrated in 2010 fantasy baseball seems odd. He was hurt last year and that was coming off two years when he was just a’ight. And just a’ight is several levels removed from a’ight a’ight. Just a’ight is not even the same as just a’ight. On the scale of a’ight, there’s a’ight a’ight, a’ight, pretty a’ight, just a’ight. Not to mention, we’re talking about a’ight here. We’re not talking about him on the scale of totes crazy. He hasn’t been totes crazy since 2006. Back then, I could see throwing on some Aramis. That shizz was Spanish Fly. In 2006, he threw up a line of 93/38/119/.291/2. Nice, next time I see 2005 I’ll tell him to keep an eye out for that. This year I have Aramis down for 75/25/95/.290. Adrian Beltre looks at those numbers and shrugs. Don’t trust me and my mustache? Bill James has him down for 76/26/97/.292; CHONE has 67/22/84/.289; Marcel has 59/18/72/.290. Points Shares has him at 122th, earning -.26 points. Sweet, throw him in a pot with some bell peppers and cumin and you have crap.
I know what a lot of you are thinking. What the eff does totes crazy mean? Actually, I thought you were thinking Aramis will beat my projections this year because it’s a contract year. Ah, yes. The contract year theory. For those not in the know, the contract year theory is when someone’s production peaks the year they are about to enter free agency, allowing them to cash in. The first known example of the contract year theory was when Noah built the ark before signing a lifetime contract that produced nothing except odd texts about animal fornication. It didn’t catch on in baseball for many years later. In 1897, the Cleveland Spiders management gave a $50 raise to Sparky Anklebiter after a massive 3 HR season only to see him drop to 0 HRs the next year. I wish someone would flip the script on players who play well in their contract year. I’d love to hear a negotiation go something like this, “For you to be so much better in your contract year, it means you were sandbagging it for the previous three years. Yeah, we want someone who sandbags it. We’re going to sign Jack Wilson instead. He throws well.” Okay, now for actual examples of contract year players from last year: Beltre (8 homers and crizzap), Rick Ankiel (lots of strikeouts, ugly bout with an outfield wall), Erik Bedard (usual injury shizz), Khalil Greene (ended up in the psyche ward), Rich Harden (see Bedard), Brett Myers (bunch of hits off him, some thrown at his wife) and Xavier Nady (season ended April 14th). Yay, contract year theory. That shizz is foolproof.
Aramis Ramirez is currently being drafted on average around 60th. That’s about 3 rounds too early. He’s overrated. Grey out.