Andrew Bailey will need thumb surgery, according to one doctor. He’s scheduled to get a second opinion today. That second doctor’s gonna say, “The first doctor and I play golf and he only sent you to me to run up your doctor bills. Of course you need surgery.” My opinion is Bailey is always hurt and he’s gonna miss a few months. When Bailey was first traded to the Sawx in the offseason, I even opined, “When Melancon went to the Sawx, I said, “The GM over in Beantown says Melancon is “capable of closing.” In big market speak, that means he won’t be the closer. Melancon is the stereotypical small market closer, big market set-up man.” Prescient ain’t just a word you need a spell checker for. It’s a state of mind! Bailey will be absolutely fine as a closer when he’s healthy, which is to say maybe 4 of 6 months of the season if the Sawx are lucky.” And that’s me quoting me! I don’t just bring this up for the Bailey news, but I wanted to say again how the Sawx GM originally pegged Melancon as having closer potential. Originally, I said he wasn’t a big market closer, but guess what y’all? He’s a heck more of a big market closer than Aceves. He has closer experience and that you can’t buy (legally outside of Canada). The Sawx are saying Aceves could get saves. I’m not sure how much I believe it. If Melancon was out there in my leagues, I grabbed him too (as in, in addition to Aceves). If Aceves does get the first couple of saves, he’ll need to be perfect to keep the job, i.e., vis-a-vis, ergo, Melancon could end up getting 25 saves even if he doesn’t get the first couple. This shituation is fluid so put on some plastic bed sheets. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for 2012 fantasy baseball:
Frank Francisco – Went for an MRI on his knee yesterday. Ah, the Mets and their injuries. The Mets doctors originally thought Francisco was dealing with patella tendinitis — is that the pre-med Indian kid who lived in my freshman dorm? Frank2 had an ERA north of 5.50 in the spring and the publicity was, “Where’s his velocity?” He thought he’d locate his electricity with tenacity, but kept ending up back at paucity, which left people grabbing Rauch in felicity, prior to her cutting her hair — the audacity! Only issue is unless your league has a category for the number of things a pitcher can reach off a top shelf, Rauch may be useless. Bobby Parnell, who I believe is the little black kid from the movie Role Models, could end up with the bulk of the saves. Then there’s Ramon Ramirez, who insists you not call him Ram-Ram, not that there’s anything wrong with a little Ram-Ram… Basically, the Mets are a shizzshow closerousel that could get you sick to your stomach. I grabbed Rauch in one league, Parnell in another league and think one of them will get the majority of the saves in April for the Mets. Either could run with the job longer too.
Jason Bay – If he struggles in the season, the Mets said they could platoon him. Not even joking here, but I think this the first bit of Mets front office news I’ve agreed with since they fired A.J. Mass from his Mr. Met job.
Sam Fuld – Out 4 to 5 months with wrist surgery. Will give Fuld plenty of time to hunt wabbits.
Sean Marshall – Named Cincy closer. I could’ve told you that last week, and I’m not even reading tea leaves, especially not chunky Betty Draper’s.
Aroldis Chapman – Will stay in the bullpen as a setup man for Marshall. I wonder if Aroldis would’ve signed in Cincy if he would’ve known he’d be stuck in the bullpen for his whole career. Coming from Cuba, he should’ve known he wasn’t going to get any say in the matter with the Reds.
Tyler Colvin – Someone grabbed Colvin in my NL-Only draft during the free round and everyone groaned. Colvin is a whole lot of nothing right now, but prepare for Fowler to get benched a game here and there and Colvin to get a chance. If he does well with those chances, Colvin will be a hot add everywhere.
Josh Beckett – Has a thumb injury, but shouldn’t miss his first start. Beckett did go to Texas to get it checked out. I’m guessing he didn’t hitchhike.
Carlos Lee – Ken Rosenthal reported that Lee can block trades to 14 teams this year. With 18.5 million still going to Lee, 29 teams are hoping they’re one of the 14.
Dayan Viciedo – Hit a home run yesterday and finished with a .196 average. Spring training numbers mean nothing, but I wouldn’t be shocked if this Cuban raftee sees an average around .200 this year.
Randall Delgado – Won the fifth rotation spot for the Braves. As of right now, Delgado doesn’t look like he’s going to pitch well or past May 1st when Hudson returns. Last year, he had an ERA of 2.83 in 7 games started, but a hideous K-rate, walk rate and xFIP. I’m worried about his walk rate and K-rate dropping as he moves up to a new level. Right now, I wouldn’t risk it outside of NL-Only leagues.
Tyler Pastornicky – Hey, the clergyman that Carmella made out with was named the Braves starting shortstop. I went over my Pastornicky fantasy already. I wrote it while being disappointed by the Worst Cooks in America finale.
Roger Bernadina – Nursing a right knee contusion, but should be fine for Opening Day. Yesterday, in VinWins’ post about RCL trends, I was surprised to see Bernadina wasn’t drafted at all. Not that I need to explain myself to you, but there’s gonna be a post later today from Rudy that is gonna blow your mind. Let’s just say, just when you thought my mustache couldn’t get any fuller, it just did.
Jesus Montero – Was escorted off the field after getting beaned in the back of the helmet. After the game, Wedge said he’s okay, it got him “in the fat part of the helmet.” Then Kevin Smith started a Twitter campaign demanding helmets of any size are treated the same, then Michelle Obama started a helmet nutrition program and the fat helmet lost weight and wasn’t nearly as funny.