July 4th is right around the corner, and I know you got tons of big (that’s me finger quoting) plans for the weekend. So I’ll cut right to the chase and break down some of the injuries affecting fantasy baseball at the moment. Just remember, when you’re two cases of beer in and your starting shortstop breaks his finger sliding headfirst into second base, don’t, I repeat, don’t take out your frustrations by launching fireworks at your computer.
Carlos Gonzalez, Rockies: CarGo is pleased with how his finger has been healing, but he’s the last person in the world you’d wanna take injury advice from. It’ll be nice for owners to get their first-round pick back, but it’s just as likely that he’ll land on the DL with some girly injury five games after returning.
Michael Wacha, Cardinals: Cards pitchers have been dropping like flies and their stud 22-year-old could be out for a while with a “stress reaction” in his shoulder. Wacha, Wacha, Wacha! No, seriously, it’s not funny.
Nolan Arenado, Rockies: Good news for Arenado’s owners, as his return to the diamond seems to be speeding up. He was supposed to start his Triple-A rehab assignment on Sunday, but it got moved up to Saturday. If all goes well, the Rox 3B could be back in the major league lineup by mid-week. He was hitting .305/.333/.489 with 6 HR, 28 RBI and 27 runs scored before pulverizing his finger and is available in 16 percent of ESPN.com leagues. I know fantasy football drafts have started and all, but, c’mon…
Andrew Cashner, Padres: Has all the talent in the world but can’t seem to stay healthy this year. At least being on the DL will save him from a 20-loss season.
Shane Victorino, Red Sox: I warned you about this guy last week and now he’s been shut down — and not because of his original injury (hamstring), but due to a back issue. The fact that he still remains rostered in 44 percent of ESPN leagues is appalling. Victorino is not theres (but maybe Mookie Betts will be).
Angel Pagan, Giants: It was about time that San Fran put him on the DL. Since the team waited so long to actually put him there (he had sat out eight straight games), he will be eligible for reinstatement today (an off-day for the Giants) and could return tomorrow. Even if the scenario plays out that way, it’s best for owners to exercise caution with him for the remainder of the season. His current injury is to his back, but don’t forget that he still has a partially torn patella tendon in his knee. If he wants to get better, he should consider changing his name to Demon Monotheism. Hey, it can’t hurt to mix things up a little.
Bud Norris, Orioles: A pesky groin pull landed the O’s starter on the DL. He may have to miss a couple of turns in the rotation. Keep icing that thing, Buddy.
David Wright, Mets: The Mets franchise cornerstone was sent back home from Pittsburgh to undergo tests on his sore shoulder, which revealed no structural damage. It’s possible he heads to the DL and is kept out through the All-Star break, but for now, it looks like the team will let him rest and remain on the active roster. It’s a shame, cuz with RBIs in eight of his last nine games, he was really starting to hit the ball well. Mets fans will continue to stew in their own sh*t.
Francisco Liriano, Pirates: His most recent bullpen session went well and he could be back in the rotation by mid-July. That’s supposed to be a good thing?
Cliff Lee, Phillies: Remember him? Kinda seems like he hasn’t pitched in, like, forever. Well, technically its been six weeks. The Phillies have been taking extra precaution with him and it seems to be working. Anything to avoid surgery, right? There’s hope the ace will be back by the All-Star break. Be-Lee-ve dat!
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