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Alex Castellanos was called up by the Dodgers to replace the DL’d Kemp, so what’s this guy’s story?  He was found in an orphanage in Crete.  He grew up eating ambrosia, feta and olives.  He spent all of his waking hours either playing baseball or pooping because of his diet.  Oh, you mean what’s his story as in what’s his stats like?  He looks like a product of the PCL, which is more glamorous than a product of Greek economists, but just as dangerous.  As we know, hitting in the PCL is like hitting on the moon with an aluminum bat.  So far in Triple-A this year (21 games), he has 4 homers, 7 steals and a .361 average.  That’s being wholly supported by an inflated BABIP because his K-rate isn’t pretty.  He’s closer to a .270 hitter with 10-ish homer power and 15-ish steal speed.  That’s solid enough in NL-Only leagues for a placeholder, but I’d hold off in mixed leagues for now.  In keepers, I’d pursue slightly more aggressively, but he is already 25 and from his picture it looks like it’s a Latin 25.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Matt Kemp – Won’t return for at least 4 weeks with a strain in two different places.  One place is his hamstring, the other place is his ears from the high-pitched screeches of his fantasy owners.    Hopefully, he only needs a month, but no one’s saying yet.  As Vin Scully would say, “The truth is out there.”  Wait, that’s the wrong Scully.

Ted Lilly – Headed for an MRI on Friday.  Sounds like Friday is dress up day in the Lilly household.  This week he’s being Chipper Jones.

Chad Billingsley – 6 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks.  His ERA is now at 4.09.  Member in the beginning of the year when some people got sucked in by Billingsley?  Ah, yes, we were younger then, and you had more hair!

Nick Markakis – Injured his hamate bone and will miss a month.  That’ll teach Markakis to anger Hamatheus, God of Wrists.

Jeff Samardzija – The Cubs announced every player is for sale, except Samardzija.  So the Cubs voweled to lose everyone.

Troy Tulowitzki – Placed on the DL today after we reported yesterday that he would be placed on the DL after reading about it elsewhere.  It’s the world we live in.  I blame Twitter.

Carlos Gonzalez – 3-for-4, 3 runs, 3 RBIs as he homered in his 4th straight at-bat.  You’re clutch, CarGo.  The Elias Sports Bureau said CarGo’s month of May gave more fantasy baseballers an erection than any month since Jeter’s owners in July of 2009, but that was because his then-current girlfriend, Rachel Uchitel, was in the stands at every game.  Actually, they didn’t say that, but this was heard this week around the Elias Sports Bureau, “Bill, in accounting, asked 17 different people if they thought his Facebook statuses were funny, which was a new record, besting his previous week’s 16 times.”

Michael Cuddyer – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs as he takes over the cleanup spot in Colorado.  So far, Cuddyer’s been surprisingly valuable.  I don’t mean no one expected it, I mean if you look at his power and speed stats, they don’t seem great, but he’s on pace for a 90/20/100/.280/12 season, which is valuable.  Considering Uggla will hit .250 with 30 homers and no steals, it’s basically the same fantasy value as Cuddyer.

Jordan Pacheco – 3-for-5, 2 RBIs and a steal.  He’s now hit in 15 of 16 games, but since he’s had little outside of just hits (no steals or homers), I haven’t talked much about him.  So let’s, shall we?  Thanks, clunky expository question!  Pacheco, might have a name that sounds like a Japanese video game company, but he doesn’t put up video game numbers.  If you combine all of his minor league homers above High-A, he has 10 homers in 2 years.  In the same amount of time, he has 5 steals.  The toilet called and said flush me.  He’s really nothing to see outside of NL-Only leagues, and even there he has little upside.  I’d say he’s going to be in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell, but he won’t.  I just talked about him here.  Go back to the word, “Jordan,” and read again.

David Robertson – (Someone just got caught in an endless loop of reading Pacheco’s blurb.  That’ll teach them to listen to me!)  Robertson’s out another two weeks, though there’s no discomfort in his oblique — vague (why he needs 2 more weeks then).  Stop flying so close to the sun with your dazzling K-rate and pitch for our deep league fantasy teams.

Brett Gardner – Could take BP this weekend.  Where’s he taking Brandon Phillips?  He has games!  *checking notes*  Oh, that means batting practice.

Alex Avila – He left yesterday’s game after taking a foul ball off the nose.  The Tigers are calling him day-to-day.  Hopefully he has unlimited minutes.

Will Middlebrooks – I found this to be hilarious.  To help get him in the lineup, the Red Sox had Middlebrooks take grounders at shortstop.  I picture them saying, “He’s never played middle infield, but he has middle in his name so he should be a natural.”  Next thing you know, the Red Sox are going to commission a play from Daniel Bard.

Josh Beckett – 7 IP, 4 ER, 11 baserunners, 1 K.  Since baseball thought it was Sandy Koufax and Thursday was Yom Kippur, it scheduled next to no games, so I got to watch a full Red Sox game for the first time all year.  My biggest takeaway is… Who is Jenny Dell?   This girl should be a sportscaster for every sporting event ever evented.  Who’s her agent?  Who’s her husband?  Who lives next door to her and can they sublet me a room?  My other takeaway is Josh Beckett was lucky to only give up 4 runs.  He fooled one guy — the cameraman who panned up when it was just a line drive.

Jarrod Saltalamacchia – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs as he homered yesterday.  As previously mentioned aforementionedly, there was next-to-no baseball yesterday, so I got to thinking about how if Saltalamacchia’s parents had come over to America when there was a backlash against ethnic surnames, he would’ve shortened his name to Salt.  So that’s a vote for homogeny.

Max Scherzer – 6 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 6 Ks.  He just seems to go through moments of lost focus.  Their lines aren’t that different, but Scherzer looked a lot better than Beckett.  Then again, I’m not a scout; we were all fired when Moneyball came out.

Quintin Berry – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 steals.  He went 1-for-9 with 7 Ks in the two prior games.  Also, Austin Jackson is due back shortly.  I’m not trying to rain on his parade, just suggesting you bring an umbrella.

Bud Norris – 1 2/3 IP, 9 ER at Colorado.  I love you, but you were a gooftard if you started Norris in this game.

J.D. Martinez – 1-for-4 with a homer.  Ya know, he would’ve been a smart extremely short schedule day pick up.  Alas, hindsight is Freddie Freeman’s vision with goggles.

Adam Lind – He was sent to Triple-A yesterday, after the Blue Jays sent him to waivers, and he wasn’t claimed by anyone.  Nick Punto has a major league job and no one’s claiming Lind.  Imagine the grimiest nightclub, then imagine the coat room at 4 AM.  Now look inside the one coat that’s left there?  There’s a dead prostitute in that jacket!  That’s Lind!

From Around The Web

  1. About Middlebrooks, didn’t the RedSox say they couldn’t move him to the OF when they lost Cody Ross and Youk was coming back? And now they’re thinking he could play SS? Your point about Lind going unclaimed while, mysteriously, Punto is gainfully employed is a good one. But sometimes it’s just as astonishing to me that the brain trust in Boston isn’t taken out back and shot.

    Oh, my question: What’s your take on the Seattle closer situation? Do you think League gets the job back when he starts pitching well in middle relief? Who do you think is more likely to re-inherit the closer role they lost between League, Marmol, and Walden?

    And does the fact that Houston isn’t quite as bad as everyone thought change the early-season calculus that they’d trade Brett Myers at some point? I haven’t heard anything about this recently, but I wonder if we should soon start putting Wilton Lopez or Brandon Lyon on radar screens in deep leagues where saves are at a premium.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Enrique, Yeah, pretty crazy to move him to SS… Or even consider it… I think League does get his job back… Myers will probably be traded still… If the Astros know what’s good for them…

  2. Abdoozy says:
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    @Grey, 16 team espn h2h redraft league.

    Current SP: Verlamder, Dickey, Zambo, Samarzxcvbnm, Garcia and Paulino. RP Myers, Frieri, Wiljelmsen.

    Given his bad wing would you drop Garcia or Paulino to open a streaming slot? I’d like to pick up Bailey for his Pitt start but have no room at the inn…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Abdoozy, You should let Paulino go against Oakland then look at who to drop…

  3. Blue says:
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    Please rank E Johnson, Simmons, Everth.

    Also, what is the A’s closer’s situation? Between Fuentes, Cook and Balfour – who would you want to own?

    • stoopid says:
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      @Blue, Hard to argue against Fuentes right now.. This is coming from a spiteful Balfour drafter/owner as well..

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Blue, Fuentes… Everth, Simmons

  4. Howard says:
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    @Grey CI ROS: Johnson, Reynolds, Frazier, Smoak? Thanks!

    • Howard says:
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      @Howard, Can add Chisenhall to that mix.

      • Howard says:
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        @Howard, and Wiggy! Sorry!

        • Howard says:
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          @Howard, Currently holding Johnson. Hey, that didn’t sound right!

          • mauledbypandas says:
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            @Howard, I giggled

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Howard, Reynolds

  5. Prezii says:
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    Fat adams over infante, right?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Prezii, Yup

  6. Prezii says:
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    And no mention on fielders triple?? Figured you’d be lickin your chops on that one… You coulda said “Prince Fielder: He tripled.” And it would have been hilarious!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Prezii, Ha

  7. Steve says:
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    Good work on Jenny Dell. Good work indeed.

    Thoughts on Tomlin v MIN on Saturday? H2H…

    • stoopid says:
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      @Steve, NESN does a damn good job hiring female reporters.. Heidi Watney, Jenny Dell, & Kathryn Tappen(Bruins)..

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Steve, Yup… I’d start him…

  8. TheNewGuy says:
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    Loaded with starters now, cut Jaime or Holland to activate Craig for today? (10 teamer)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @TheNewGuy, Holland

  9. OaktownA's says:
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    have to start one of these 3b tomorrow… alvarez @ Mil (wolf), wiggy vs Mia (buehrle), frazier@ Hou (happ). which do u choose?

    • @OaktownA’s, Unless you’re talking about studs or someone facing a top pitcher, go with the hot bat, which immediately eliminates Alvarez.

      Wiggy and Frazier are both hitting well now, but I’d go with Wiggy who has a pretty good record against Buehrle on top of that.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @OaktownA’s, Wiggy

  10. MattTruss223 says:
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    Yea, when Heidi Watney announced she was leaving NESN Sawx fans were bumming. Then, they announced her replacement, Ms. Dell and everyone said, “Heidi who?”. Amazing. Do your self a favor and flip to the end of this set of Jenny Dell pictures: http://tinyurl.com/72rqtkv

    • Awesomus Maximus

      Awesomus Maximus says:
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      @MattTruss223, Meh… I tend to prefer brunettes over blondes, but in this case, I would have Heidi Watney in my lineup and Jenny Dell on the bench. Cust kayin’.

      • MattTruss223 says:
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        @Awesomus Maximus, Tough problem to have…

    • stoopid says:
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      @MattTruss223, I was a little bummed when the NESN/Bruins lost Kathry Tappen to the NHL network.. Naoko just doesn’t do it for me

      Heidi to Jenny was a definite upgrade though

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @MattTruss223, She ain’t bad either…

  11. thegreater says:
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    Drop Venable for Colby Rasmus? Leap from creeper to creeper?

    • Thegreater says:
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      I also have frenchy, so of the three which two would you want?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @thegreater, Rasmus, Frenchy

  12. Matt says:
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    Is dropping Matt Moore for Felix Doubront in a 10-team ESPN Standard Mixed Roto League justifiable?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Matt, Nope

  13. Wow, that’s awesome. A Clutch Cargo reference. Creepy lips forever.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @The Miracles, Ha

  14. C.O.C. says:
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    Two huge questions pertaining to a potential trade I’m making: I’ve read you saying you believe Sale only gets 120 innings this year…sticking to that even if the Sox are in contention? If not, what do you think is the magic #? Also, Salty or Doumit rest of the year?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @C.O.C., 120 IP… Salty…

  15. MrHappyTime says:
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    Buchholz vs Tor or Paulino vs A’s today?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @MrHappyTime, Paulino

  16. Bombo Rivera says:
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    I need 3 of these guys for the next three days (lineups lock for the weekend).

    Moustakas (vs OAK)
    Hosmer (vs OAK)
    ARam (vs PIT)
    Quentin (vs ARI)

    Which guy sits?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Bombo Rivera, Not Hosmer…

      • mauledbypandas says:
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        @Grey, what the hell, June Grey giving Hosmer a second..er.. thousandth chance?

  17. schlitzy says:
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    Can you rank Rios, Rasmus, Kubel and Dirks ROS? thanks, friend.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @schlitzy, You did

  18. papasmurf says:
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    I thought JD Martinez was a lefty hitter! I dunno why, I have looked at his profile page before but still thought he was a lefty. I guess his name sounds like a lefty.

    So last week when he had a big gm vs. Kershaw and I needed a fill in at LF I said hey that’s impressive! So I set it and forget it, three days later I am back from weekend vacation and he’s like 0 for 11! Bugeye moment that was. At least he has 4 hits in the last two games… Anyway, Craig’s back and he’s a goner.

    I had Salty, Pacheco (streamer), Martinez, and Cuddyer going yesterday in a 3 game day. It was a sweet day.

    • @papasmurf, me too! had a sonovabench in april when i benched him against a lefty

  19. Vacation says:
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    Grey, I love you, but as a Braves fan the Chipper jokes are starting to grate.

    • Yeah, I Remember When says:
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      @Vacation, seriously? as a Braves fan myself, I wish Chipper would have retired two years ago.

      • MattTruss223 says:
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        @Yeah, I Remember When, Really? When the dude’s in the lineup he rakes. I’m no DH fan, but boy, would he be the perfect candidate. He’s a hitting machine.

  20. coco krispie says:
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    I meant to comment the other day but I LOVED the Mike Seaver rant. I remember watching that episode!

    Anyway who has more value in a vacuum rest of season, Texeira or Reyes?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @coco krispie, Thanks! Reyes…

  21. kg says:
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    Please rank Holland, Smyly, Doubront, Paulino.
    Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @kg, Paulino, Doubront

  22. Awesomus Maximus

    Awesomus Maximus says:
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    Any chance Bard’s play will be adapted into an opera, and Jose Iglesias will be called up to play the lead?

    —–

    “if they thought since Facebook statuses were funny”

    Is this a typo, or just something I’m unfamiliar with because I’m not on Facebook?

    • stoopid says:
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      @Awesomus Maximus, I was guessing “since” was supposed to be “his”?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Awesomus Maximus, Oops

  23. Phil says:
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    Yasmani Grandal called up today. Am I really supposed to be excited for a .300 hitting catcher in Petco who might have to share duties with Nick “Gumby” Hundley?

    • bean says:
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      @Phil, In an NL Only league there isnt much to get excited about so this ranks up there with New Coke or Bud Light Lime in my realm.

      Catches your attention, you may try it, but in the end you knew it would taste like shizz.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Phil, Probably not now….

  24. Mike says:
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    Brantley or Seager for utility position ROS?
    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Mike, Seager

  25. Commish Cauda says:
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    Markakis angering the Gods
    The Greek economy
    The Myth of Daedalus & Icarus

    Nice trifecta. I’m learning on so many levels!

    What is it, Greek Awareness Day? The only Greek I knew was the little coffee shop down on State Street. Jimmy Pitsos, remember him? He had an ugly wife, four ugly kids, and good coffee.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Commish Cauda, I loved Jimmy… Didn’t he teach you the Triple Lindy?

  26. LobBall says:
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    Grey,

    I need to drop a 1B. Adams, C. Davis, LaHair, or Scott?
    Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @LobBall, LaHair

  27. El Gato says:
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    Yasmani Grandal – guy rakes at minors, but is called up to Petco – boom goes the dynamite.

    What do you think his upside is in that situation? Assuming he steps in full time – worth taking a chance on him in a keeper league over Arencibia? I’m fearing another 3 for 35 with 23k slump from JP.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @El Gato, He’s not full time…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @El Gato, But if he is… I’d want JP…

  28. Bip Roberts says:
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    Got an offer in which I would be sending Eric Hosmer and Michael Young for Justin Upton and Rickie Weeks. House has been living in a box the last 2 months and Young is getting, well, you know. Do these brothers that have brothers from the same mothers make a fair swap for eachothers? Or should I stay away? Injury concerns aside, who wins. I could use the bags.

    • ThE sHiT says:
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      @Bip Roberts, Take it and run. Upton is by far the best player in the deal. Hit accept ASAP before the dude realizes what he did.

  29. RTP says:
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    Need a fill at SS for Tulo for 15 days (or longer, UGH)

    Evereth Cabrera, Seager, Alexei Ramirez, Alicdes Escobar, or Andrelton Simmons

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @RTP, Alexei

  30. Alcesto says:
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    Yo Grey, 12 team 5×5 mixer, I’m 25 innings ahead of pace, 1450 ip limit. I’ve got bumgarner going against the cubs, and capuano staying on the bench for his turn at coors. Are you starting paulino against Oakland here, or are you concerned about his last effort?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Alcesto, I’d start him…

  31. mauledbypandas says:
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    Re: Jenny Dell.

    seems older than 30, but she’s in my starting lineup of female baseball reporters. Also that one from colorado’s broadcast.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @mauledbypandas, *nods*

  32. Salty Balty says:
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    In a bit of a tough spot. Already lost Werth, Tulo,Panda and K. Johnson looks very, very gimpy. I need offense. Shopping K. Jansen and the best I can get is Angel Pagan. I’m weak in AVG and SBs so the trade fits my needs. Also a holds league, so saves aren’t quite as valuable. Pull the trigger?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Salty Balty, Nope

  33. Dan Pants

    blairtch says:
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    LOL, Greece..

    You like-a the juice, ah?

    Helios! More juice for the gyro!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @blairtch, Ha!

  34. AnotherFalstaff says:
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    @Grey – Since I grew up watching WGN cartoons after Cubs losses maybe they can pick up Spinner and Paddlefoot after their fire sale. Clutch takes me back. Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @AnotherFalstaff, There ya go…

  35. The Talented Mr. Dope Man says:
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    Hey Grey,

    can you do me a favor and tell Rudy that the Player Rater for 12 TM NL only is “glitching” again where it only shows the top 117 players.

    Also,

    Is Yasman Grandal worth an add over Hector Sanchez or Josh Thole? 12 TM NL ONLY start 2 C’s.

    • @The Talented Mr. Dope Man, Found the issue. Should be fixed in a couple minutes.

      Definitely Grandal > Sanchez in 12 Team NL. Not Thole.

      • @Rudy Gamble, The issue is fixed on the NL 12 team only player rater- thanks for reporting it!

  36. Cheese says:
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    Would you say Cuddyer is worth Uggla for the rest of the season? I have an excess of power, and need some batting average. I’m assuming the other owner values Uggla over Cuddyer, so I could ask for Cuddyer + OF depth (Crisp, Maybin, etc.).

    16 team league, 8×8 (H, BB, SLG)

    Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Cheese, They’re close enough if you need an OF…

  37. Carlos says:
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    Who to start

    G. Floyd @ home against the Mariners,
    Volquez @ home against the Diamondbacks, or
    Cahill @ San Diego?

    Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Carlos, Volquez

  38. TheNewGuy says:
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    Grandal over Doumit?

    Big prospect but dunno how much he’s gonna play.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @TheNewGuy, I’d hold

  39. Big B says:
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    Y Grandal was called up by the Padres….Buy/Sell??

    • Cheese says:
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      @Big B, What do you mean sell? How is anyone selling him? Unless you mean pick him up then trade him…

      • bean says:
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        @Cheese, I think he means buy/pass or buy/give him the finger?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Big B, Depends on your league

    • Chillmodious says:
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      @Denys, Proving yet again that “Ginger” is never the right answer.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Denys, Ha

  40. Jaw says:
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    Add which two of the below. 10 team h2h

    Dirks, duda, Ike, frenchy, mark Reynolds, lomo, demon, belt, Alonso, Brantley

    Best mi replacement for tulo? Alexei, walker, cozart, yunel, alcidses

    Also better Dl stash Werth or Markakis?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jaw, Frenchy, Reynolds… Alexei… Werth

  41. Hardcore Midget says:
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    Is Cuddyer going to be more valuable than Howie Kendrick for the rest of the season?
    Was just offered a deal of Cuddyer for my Samardzija, but didn’t know if it was worth doing with Kendrick already at 2b on my team.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Hardcore Midget, Yup

  42. Chillmodious says:
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    Yasmani! The Grandal Duke of York!!

    • peter says:
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      @Chillmodious, Ha!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Chillmodious, Ha!

  43. Adam says:
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    Start Paulino vs OAK tonight?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Adam, Yes

  44. harkrider says:
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    Smoak, Rasmus, Frenchy, Adams, Rizzo, Fowler, Everth or Alexei

    I really need HR’s and RBI’s, but I have both Bonifacio and Desmond Jennings on the DL so I’m losing ground in our roto league with SB’s. Who should I pick up (position doesn’t matter for this pick)? Here is my current team

    We have no MI or CI spot, but we start 4 OF and 2 UTIL

    Posey, Votto, Uggla, JJ Hardy, Lawrie, CarGo, Bruce, Heyward, Trumbo, Rios, Youk w/ Jennings and Bonifacio on the DL

    • harkrider says:
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      @harkrider, Duda and Allen Craig are available too

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @harkrider, Frenchy, Rasmus

  45. Jay says:
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    5×5 roto 12 team
    Rest of the way:
    N Walker vs. Cozart vs. J Weeks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jay, Weeks

  46. Bottom Feeder says:
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    6×6 H2H OPS
    been offered Miggy for A-Gonz/Reddick/Shields.
    too much to give for Cabrera? Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Bottom Feeder, Not too much

  47. Far Beyond Driven says:
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    Rank these nerds (NERDS!!!) in a 14-team ML 5×5 (OBP) ignoring needs:

    Yonder Alonso, Todd Frazier, Gregor Blanco, Alfonso Soriano, Jose Tabata. Thanks.

    • Chillmodious says:
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      @Far Beyond Driven, My nerd ranking: Booger, Takashi, Wormser, Poindexter. Grab Lamar if you’re desperate for a catcher (Hey-O!).

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Far Beyond Driven, Alf, Frazier, Alonso

  48. Project_badass says:
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    12-team H2H 6×6 (OBP, QS), Moves limit of 50 (I am at 19)

    I have been stashing Oswalt, Medlen, and Peacock since this league really values SP and has extremly deep benches…Would you drop Peacock to pick up the Wildly Filthy Shanchez who should return in about 2 weeks and supposedly “looks sharp?” I have no DL spots available (Berkman, Emilio, Jay)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Project_badass, I’d hold

  49. Tom says:
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    Report today that Boston aggressively trying to trade Youklis..
    If middlebrooks plays full time..how much do u like him?
    Over Seager? Over Chris Davis?
    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Tom, I like him over Seager

  50. Peter says:
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    Everth Cabrera or Stephen Lombardozzi in a 15 team roto league?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Peter, Everth

  51. Long Bawls says:
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    Gooftard here. I started Norris, and since almost everyone had the day off yesterday and got to watch baseball instead of playing, I imagine a scene like this:

    Play-by-play guy: And Bud Norris has–
    Lincecum: Did somebody say bud?
    PBP guy: –given up nine hits
    Lincecum: Did somebody say hits?
    Torii: Alleged hits
    Brett Myers: That’s right

    • ThE sHiT says:
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      @Long Bawls, Lmao, thats awesome!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Long Bawls, Ha!

    • Wilsonian says:
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      @Long Bawls, that’s nothing short of incredible. Well played, sir. Well played…

  52. EK says:
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    I was offered R. Zimmerman for Asdrubal.. 12 team H2H points… thoughts? I have Hanley I can move to SS…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @EK, I’d want Asdrubal

  53. chelsea bb fan says:
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    Hi Grey,

    I am new to this site. I play in a 16 team league that is head to head points.

    I need to pick three starters for this week to stream. Can you please help me choose the top 3 out these 4? If you could rank them too that would be great! Thanks <3

    Hutchison v Red Sox
    Fiers v Pirates
    Eovaldi @ Rockies
    Wood @ Giants <— i like wood. shouldnt be too hard to beat Giants.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @chelsea bb fan, Welcome! Fiers, Wood, Hutchison…

      • Poo Holes says:
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        @Grey, No joke about liking wood and hard in the same comment?! Damn, I guess my young mind is just too immature…

  54. peter says:
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    “Marquis goes 7 strong at AA”

    Get that man a token!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @peter, Ha!

  55. bobbo says:
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    David Wright 2 for his last 22 as he teaches that crazy Razzball poster from two weeks ago about regression. Thank god we didn’t defrost Teddy’s head!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @bobbo, Ha

  56. Coco krispie says:
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    Drop rickie weeks for Aaron hill at this point?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Coco krispie, Yup

  57. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Grey: Is trading Beachy for Starlin fair? I’m looking to upgrade at SS, and have pitching to spare. I also have Gio, Bum, Anibal, Zimm, Peavy, Latos.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @ThE sHiT, It’s a good trade, I’d do it…

  58. MindiCohn says:
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    My team this year is a whole lot of garbage…Might be having my worst year as a fantasy manger…Fr’instance, just traded Hanley for Matt Cain ($18 keeper) and then Fielder / Marcum for Felix.

    That leaves me with this lineup:
    C – Pierzynski
    1b – Youk
    2b – Cano ($21)
    SS – Castro ($10)
    3b – Moustakas ($4)
    OF – Craig, Gordon, Ichiro
    Util – Pedroia and Moreland
    Bench – boesch,markakis,rizzo

    SP – Price ($18), Cain (18), Felix, Lester, Zambrano
    RP – Kimbrel,Soriano, Clippard
    Bench – Lester / Dickey

    I’ve got some FAAB claims to pick up guys like Fowler,Rasmus & Frenchy – dropping Boesch,Markakis and if Sparky goes on DL – the DL spot.

    I’min last place — started the season wiht Liriano & Scherzer blowing up my whip/era as well as a few other streamers…

    That said, i’m being offered Mike Trout ($22 keeper) and Gallardo (i wouldnt keep) for Felix…Methinks this is bad but i’ve literally lost all confidence in making any moves this season…
    Plus, Blair and Jo keep making fun of me for losing my virginity on a made for tv movie.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @MindiCohn, Shake it off, Mindi, you’ll be okay! I’d take Trout…

    • Poo Holes says:
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      @MindiCohn, I’d kill for a squad like that…emoticon.

  59. Crustopher says:
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    C’mon – you gotta come up with something for the 1/4 with a homer stat line. Luke Scott would love you for it.

    What about a “Donkey Dong” after my men Dunn & Reynolds? Or a “Balboner” after late great KC Royal Steve Balboni? (Is he dead – who gives a shizz, he’s dead to me.)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Crustopher, Ha… I enjoyed your passion…

  60. Tom says:
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    is it time to dump andy dirks for someone on waiver wire?

    bunch of guys out there..reynolds, smoak, d. young, matt adams.

    12 team mixed with large bench (obp league)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Tom, Adams

  61. Poo Holes says:
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    I wouldn’t say NESN sideline reporters are the reason why I watch baseball, but I will.

    NESN sideline reporters are the reason why I watch baseball.

    I’m actually mad no one has proposed this yet, but MFK: Tappen, Watney, Dell. I’m fucking the shit out of Dell (even though it’s rumored she smokes a pack a day, can’t be true if you’ve seen that body), marrying Tappen (wouldn’t say I’m the biggest hockey fan in the world, but I’ve tuned into NHL network a couple times cause I just miss her) and offing Watney (anyone who has an affair with Varitek is tainted goods).

    • Herschel says:
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      @Poo Holes, Well played.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Poo Holes, HA! Well done…

  62. Brian says:
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    Would you make this trade?

    I give BJ Upton, Angel Pagan and Mike Aviles for Kevin Youkilis, Nellie Cruz and Dee Gordon.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Brian, Yup

  63. kratos says:
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    Alexei or Dee

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @kratos, Dee

  64. Poo Holes says:
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    Also, regarding that Kinsler/Hamilton for Reyes/Bautista/#2 or 3 starter deal from last night, would you prefer Hellickson, Garza, or Marcum for the long haul, meaning this year and beyond?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Poo Holes, Garza

  65. mc serch says:
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    We benching Capuano at Coors, right? Seems like tonight is a logical place for the regression to begin….

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @mc serch, Yup, bench him…

    • mauledbypandas says:
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      @mc serch, since I own him nowhere I hope you’re right about the regression train pulling into Coors. It would take some pretty large ones to start him there.

  66. Junior Ortiz says:
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    Random nickname proposals because I can’t get them out of my head: Can we call David Roberston the Vice-Admiral, because he’s almost David Robinson?

    No? Just me. OK …

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Junior Ortiz, Ha!

      • chata says:
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        @Grey,

        am “ha”ing you ,
        ‘cuz you have no idea who david robinson is .
        ha .

  67. HotRod says:
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    Best Short-term Utility Option:

    Alonso, Salty, or Grandal?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @HotRod, Salty

  68. A Hill O' Beans says:
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    Grey,

    What level of MI do you think would be reasonable to get in a trade if you were going to sell high on Melky right now?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @A Hill O’ Beans, Rollins? Maybe Cuddyer? Uggla?

  69. TheNewGuy says:
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    Looking for a bit more quality over quantity in terms of starters in my 10 teamer. Been offered this:

    The Adverb
    FOR
    The Peav and Marcum

    Bit worried that Peavy is starting to come back down to earth along with his injury history and Lee’s performance has been typical of him this year despite the 0 wins. Should I go for it?

    See if Peavy is back on form tonight and if not make the deal?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @TheNewGuy, I’d take Lee…

      • TheNewGuy says:
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        @Grey, Got it done.

    • WhineSpritzer says:
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      @TheNewGuy, I’d definitely take Lee

  70. JustMatt says:
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    12-team – Mixed League – 2 Catchers
    Drafted Soto & LuCroy; picked up Flores when Soto got hurt and Grandal when LuCroy got hurt.
    Best FA catchers who are playing right now are probably Olivo, Barajas & Suzuki.
    Two Questions: 1. Do I have the right two catchers in place right now? 2. Do I make some kind of pick-up now to prepare for longer term (Ramos, Perez, Hernandez and Mesoraco are available)?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @JustMatt, 1. I’d hold 2. Hold for now…

  71. Jam405 says:
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    Hate to ask you another Tulo fill in question, but the list of schmucks available on my WW is slightly different. Wish I had the option to grab Sexy Alexei… In a completely Platonic sense… Oh ya, the list!
    Al. Escobar, y. Escobar, A. Simmons, EverCab, Cozart, Aybar.

    Thanks sir, have a great weekend.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jam405, Ha… Alcides… You too!

  72. Can’t believe I didn’t grab Berry for SB’s on the short day, if I loe by two steals I am not going to be berry berry happy.

    On a side note I notice no one is talking about how shatty Howie Kendrick has been this year, thought he was my steal draft, he seems to be dragging in all categories. I see he seems to get better in the second half, did I just set my sights too high for him or is it time to shop him around?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Shea Sera Sera, Yeah, does seem obvious now… I don’t think you can shop him for anything… Hopefully he’ll come around…

    • peter says:
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      @Shea Sera Sera, I grabbed Berry AND Podsednik. 4 for 8, 2 Runs, 2 RBI and 3 SB.

      I shall now quit Fantasy Baseball because it’s all downhill from here.

      • @peter, The worst part was I grabbed Rasmus on Wed, should have grabbed either Berry or Pod’s and then hoped Colby was around yesterday…Kicking myself.

  73. L-Boogie says:
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    CBS is reporting that “since his demotion to Las Vegas on May 17, Lind has posted a .404 average with three homers and 13 RBI” and the GM said he could rejoin the team soon. Worth owning for a bench spot or continue to ignore until he can prove himself again int he majors?

    Thanks dude.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @L-Boogie, I’d ignore…

    • Wilsonian says:
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      @L-Boogie, I’ve been watching the crap out of him in my 16 Team H2H league. I’m basically the waiver wire whore. I stalk guys and stash them if they may help out later when someone gave up on them. I got Quentin and Viciedo that way. Which has proven pretty damn helpful so far.

      I’d say if you have a deep league and can stomach the dead roster spot for a bit, I’d take a chance on him. I don’t have room for him now, or I’d already have him.

  74. OaktownSteve says:
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    Any daily game players out there with thoughts on tonight? Hamilton, Nelson Cruz against Jerome Williams. Cano, Granderson, assorted Yankees against Porcello. Blood bath in Toronto with Alvarez vs Bucholtz. Astros beating up Mike Leake. Indians get after Pavano. Any hunches?

    • WhineSpritzer says:
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      @OaktownSteve, Might not pertain to your players, but I think the Cards light up Santana tonight. And F-Her shuts down the sox while Seattle touches up Peavy.

      • OaktownSteve says:
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        @WhineSpritzer, What makes you think Santana gets lit up?

        • WhineSpritzer says:
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          @OaktownSteve, Just a hunch. And I’m a Mets fan.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @OaktownSteve, Looks like there’s gonna be a lot of offense all over… Too bad I only have Cano from the names you listed…

      • peter says:
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        @Grey, What? YOU own Cano?? Next you’ll tell me is that you drafted Morneau on a team, too.

        [jk]

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          @peter, And Hosmer, didja you hear?

          • peter says:
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            @Grey, Hadn’t heard about Hosmer. Must be tough. Good for you, keeping that stiff upper lip.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          @peter, I don’t talk about it much, helps me cope by keeping it on the inside…

          • chata says:
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            @Grey,

            not a day goes by …

          • Prezii says:
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            @Grey, hahaha.. “ya like fantasyy spotttss andd sarcasmm.. summin summin summin summ summin”

  75. B.o.B says:
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    Cespedes or Fowler RoS?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @B.o.B, Cespedes

  76. Grey's da man! says:
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    Seager or Everth at MI?

    • WhineSpritzer says:
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      @Grey’s da man!, seager

  77. EK says:
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    Tulo or Lester & Asdrubal?
    H2H points

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @EK, Tulo, but it could go the other way…

  78. Chavo says:
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    Could use a spot starter this weekend, pretty slim pickings. Zito at home against the Cubs? Derek Lowe against Min? Kyle Kendricks? PJ Walters? This is getting ugly. Need to drop someone for the pickup. I probably know the answer, but keep Rasmus or R. Weeks?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Chavo, Keep Rasmus… Zito…

  79. Grey

    Grey says:
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    ***THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS.***

  80. Wyatt Burp says:
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    16 team league, should i trade jarrod parker and matt adams for brandon mccarthy?

  81. Ned Flanders says:
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    I must’ve missed the part where you said Norris would have a bad start prior to the Colorado game.

  82. Gip says:
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    So sell SALE– Would getting Trevor Bauer for him in a keeper league be considered a “fire” sale or a “sale of as lifetime”?

Comments are closed.