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The Yankees’ extra-bat-off-the-bench in the playoffs, Alex Rodriguez, will be out for six months, following surgery on his hip that is set to take place in January.  Guess A-Rod doesn’t want to be out of service for the holiday season.  “Hey, I got a date with this smoking hot, butchy female and she wants me to dress up as Santa and sit on my lap.  Can we do this whole hip-ma-whosie Jan one?”  That’s A-Rod talking to his doctors.  Yes, A-Rod says Jan instead of January.  BTW, I Googled A-Rod surgery and the first article was at Latino dot Fox.  A-Rod is as Latino as Taco Bell.  On the fo’ really tip, why can’t he go into surgery right now?  He’s getting paid approximately four hundred million this year and he wants to delay surgery so he misses an extra month of the season?  The $17 million that went to Russell Martin just shook its head, incredulous.  If there’s a legitimate reason for the delay that I didn’t read about, there’s no legitimate reason, so don’t bother telling me about it.  Maybe if Pasta Diving Cap’n Jetes would get hip surgery in December than A-Rod would, as well.  Well, even before Rodriguez came down with the appropriate hip problem, he shouldn’t have been drafted.  He’s actually done us all a favor.  Now he’s pushed himself so far down draft boards that you won’t even have to think about it in, say, the 12th round.  For 2013, I’ll put his line at 40/13/44/.263/6 in 300 ABs.  He’s firmly in the “Do Not Touch” section of your draft board.  Anyway, here’s some more offseason moves for 2013 fantasy baseball:

Mike Napoli – Signed with the Red Sox.  Anyone besides me get the feeling that the Red Sox are right back on their terrible pre-Epstein road?  Is this a good real baseball move?  A 31-year-old ex-catcher (he’ll play 1st for the Sawx) that has only played 140 games once in a season and has had only one legitimately solid season that was buoyed by a .344 BABIP.  Eh, whatever, I guess.  For fantasy, this is a solid move for his value.  A guy with catcher eligibility playing 1st always gets a boost.  Fenway won’t hurt.  Or hoit, if anyone is reading in a Curly Howard voice.  He’s still not going to hit better than .255 without a lot of luck.  For 2013, I’ll give him the line of 71/26/84/.242/2.  Definitely should be back on radars.

Grady Sizemore – Had another microfracture surgery done.  The bad news is his knee hasn’t been right in three years.  The good news, all of these microfracture surgeries are keeping doctors with small hands in business.

James Loney – The Rays new first baseman has a first name, it’s J-A-M-E-S.  The Rays first baseman has a 2nd name… Well, you can spell.  There’s only one man that could fill a void left by Casey Kotchman and Jeff Keppinger.  And that man is, hmm, I don’t know, maybe Todd Helton.  Then Todd Helton teaches someone to be exactly 75% the player he is and you have James Loney.  In the last three years, Loney has hit around .220 vs. lefties with four homers in 395 ABs.  How many of you can say, “Needs a platoon partner?”  If you can’t say it, you might need a speech therapist.

Geovany Soto – Re-signed with the Rangers.  The catching market this offseason is about as exciting as watching a Casey Affleck starring vehicle.  People are actually interested in A.J. Pierzynski, if you catch my drift.

Kyuji Fujikawa – The 32-year-old has blown through Japanese hitters for the last 12 seasons with a 1.77 ERA and a near-12 K-rate.  There’s a chance Epstein finally convinces someone to take Marmol off his hands and Fujikawa becomes the closer.  Worst case scenario, other Cubs middle relievers can say the Japanese reliever’s first name twice and shake their bosoms like Charo.

Joakim Soria – Signed with the Rangers to be Joe Nathan’s set-up man when he returns from his 2nd Tommy John surgery.  Joakim-ill should be less ill by late-June.

Jason Marquis – Padres resigned him.  Oops, I mean, re-signed.  No, I meant resigned.  In fact, the whole team has been resigned for years.

Angel Pagan – The Giants re-signed Pagan for four years.  Sabean hopes by the end of the deal, when Pagan is 35 years old, he finally matures into the kind of player that needs a tennis ball stuck to the end of his bat and uses it to prop himself up.  For now, Pagan will continue to look like Feign Victorino with his almost ten homer power, 30-ish steal speed and .270-ish average.  Now the Giants need to sign Jon Rauch, bleach him white and have him tattoo to his neck a picture of Angel Pagan on a crucifix.  What, Dan Brown’s the one with the weird Vatican and albino fetish. I’m just taking it to its nature conclusion.

  1. An off season daily recap treat! Thanks Grey. Your developing site will take some getting used to for us vets who’ve lost our bat speed; but very well done! Impressive indeed.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @zombie: Thanks for the kind words!

  2. JT says:
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    Yo, Grey:

    I play in a near dynasty (keep 23 of 26 players, plus a minor league system). I’m thinking about not keeping A-Rod. In that format, knowing that I do have credible options in his place (I won’t bore you with listing the whole team, no wants that), would you agree?

    I still like him, but I can’t see carrying a guy with degenerative hips.

    Thanks, dooode.

    • chunk says:
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      @JT: Who would you keep instead of him?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @JT: Would be good to know your alternatives but I have to think you have better guys to keep than A-Rod…

      • JT says:
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        @Grey:

        In a holds/saves league, here’s my team. I keep 26 & cut the rest.

        1. Jose Bautista
        2. Jay Bruce
        3. Miguel Cabrera
        4.Curtis Granderson
        5. Bryce Harper
        6. Jason Heyward
        7. Matt Holliday
        8. Jason Kipnis
        9. Paul Konerko
        10. Hanley Ramirez
        11. Colby Rasmus
        12. Alex Rodriguez
        13. Carlos Santana
        14. Rickie Weeks
        15. Chris Young

        Pitching

        16. Chad Billingsley
        17. Andrew Cashner
        18. Wade Davis
        19. Jorge De La Rosa
        20. Yovani Gallardo
        21. Luke Gregerson
        22. Roy Halladay
        23. Dan Haren
        24. James McDonald
        25. Jake McGee
        26. Kris Medlen
        27. Matt Moore
        28. Jason Motte
        29. CC Sabathia
        30. Adam Wainwright
        31. Tom Wilhelmsen

        We start 10 hitters on any given day, so I doubt I would keep more than 13, and even that’s pushing it.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          @JT: You don’t have room for A-Rod…

          • JT says:
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            @Grey:

            Do you mind my asking whom you think I should cut? I’m thinking A-Rod, McGee, Gregerson, Davis, De La Rosa.

            I would hate to do it, but I have to put Rasmus, James McDonald, and Chris Young on the potential cut list, too.

            • JT says:
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              @JT:

              And Billingsley.

              Wow, I have a lot of cut worthy players. Yeah……for me?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              @JT: Bills, McDonald, Krispie… Would be the next three… Bills is hurt…

  3. Czernobog says:
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    In the last 3 years vs righties, Loney has hit 21 HR in over 1200 PAs. He needs two platoon partners.

  4. MattTruss223 says:
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    Wow, didn’t get a chance to check the site yesterday, holy cow! I read through yesterday’s comments and agree with the consensus that the extra clicking to see the full article is annoying. At the very least can the most recent article appear in full? That way your daily notes can be viewed sans the extra clicking during the season. Just a thought. We have fragile clicking fingers Grey!

    I also noticed there seems to be a lot of extra spaces. For example, if you click on the “Rankings” the page is pretty long and spread out. Maybe that’s more aesthetic for some people, but I’d prefer that be tightened up a bit. That’s minor though, I could just be used to how it was before, more of a tight list.

    On the plus side, my favorite part of the new site is the new logo and the larger avatars. Now I really feel like I’m starting into your eyes. Plus, now I can actually tell what some people’s avatars actually are. Fun stuff.

    Overall, the site looks cleaner and more professional. From a guy that isn’t a big fan of change, I like what you did with the place.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks for the kind words! I don’t see extra spaces in the drop down menu under rankings… What browser are you using? IE? Safari?

      • MattTruss223 says:
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        @Grey: Not the drop down itself, if you actually click rankings, the rankings page itself has a lot of spaces. It’s a minor thing.

        More pressing is can the most recent post be on the homepage in full? I’m fine clicking “show me more” for old posts, but your daily notes would be nice to view in full on the day they are posted. A compromise with the new set-up if you will.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          The More thing is here for the immediate future as we play around with it… If I lose the More, I have to put more ads which slows the site… So, it’s six of one, half dozen of the other… I personally think a faster site is nicer…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Oh, and as for the Rankings thing, I’ll have the positions in the actual drop down so you might not need to go to that page… Depending on how low the menu starts going…

          • MattTruss223 says:
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            @Grey: Cool on the pulldown, that’ll be nice.

            Even if you lose the “more” for ONLY the the most recent post?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              That’s the More that’s most significant… Is it that much of a PITA?

              • MattTruss223 says:
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                @Grey: Oh. Well, clearly I am not privy to interweb by-laws….in the grand scheme of things I suppose not. Just a thought.

                In other news, it should worry Sawx fans that John Lackey was instrumental in getting Napoli to sign. Huh…birds of a feather?

                I have heard Napoli is one of those “great clubhouse guys”. Maybe the Sawx are trying to sign as many anti-Becketts as possible to change their image. David Ross is one of those guys and their linked to Swisher who fits the mold as well.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  @MattTruss223: That’s the first positive effect Lackey’s had on the Red Sox, and it’s barely positive… I hear Napoli’s Mom is a great clubhouse fixture…

                  • MattTruss223 says:
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                    @Grey: Ahhh, how could I forget his Mom! That’s what Cherington was after. Morale Booster!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Red Sox, “Nothing a little nip can’t fix…”

  5. Sky

    Sky says:
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    It’s really hard to replace Kotchman’s career 1.89 GB/FB rate. The moment they saw Loney’s skyrocket last year to 1.56, they knew he had matured enough to join the team. Can actually see him giving a year like Kotchman had in 2011. Which is completely worthless unless you play in a deep league and even then, owning him makes you question why you play fantasy sports and life in general.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I don’t see why he would give a Kotchman year other than coincidence… Kotchman that year had his highest BABIP year, hard to predict that…

      • Sky

        Sky says:
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        @Grey: it’s all in the groundball rates coupled with an aggressive team on the basepaths. I don’t have the stats but it would be interesting to see how many singles Kotchman punched through the 1st base side when someone was being held on first base.

        To further this idea, take a look at Jeff Keppinger from last year: 1.81 GB/FB rate, career 1.73, almost a career high BABIP (.332 vs .333 in 276 PA in 2007). Granted he’s right handed…and the spraycharts show he’s a pull hitter…so he’s just debunked a lot of what I just said. But there’s some wizardry with high GB rates, aggressive base-running and having a high BABIP as a Rays player. I just haven’t found out what it is yet.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          FWIW, Tropicana Field actually had the lowest BABIP for any stadium…

          • Sky

            Sky says:
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            @Grey: Alright, here’s the bet:

            You say Loney hits under .300 given a minimum of 450 AB, I say he hits over. The winner gets a free mustache ride. The loser? Well, I haven’t quite figured out what you’re going to have to do yet.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              I’d be impressed if he got 450 ABs… Either way, I’ll take the bet that the Kotchman/Keppinger magic doesn’t continue…

  6. Eddy says:
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    I hate it when guys we’re sure we don’t want to touch in the AL get traded/sign in the NL. Makes you have to rethink them all over again.

    Haren signs with Nationals (1/$13). That’s a pretty intense rotation.

    • MattTruss223 says:
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      @Eddy: Funny, thought the same exact thing when I heard. I’m a Braves fan, so it was more like F&$%, That’s just what the Nats need, another F&*#@ing potential stud pitcher! Thought the Sawx might make an offer like that to Haren, they could use him more than the Nats.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I hear ya… Gotta force yourself to stay away from Haren…

  7. Al lydon says:
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    Well my wife just informed me the first day of the winter meeting’s are over.I was so involved in watching the paint drying on my bathroom wall,I must have missed it. Nope didn’t really miss anything.I think I have a spider caught in my paint in the upper right corner.Want to come over and watch with me ? Oh yeah we need to rename A-Rod to A-Not.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Al lydon: I don’t like spiders, but if you find a moth, consider yourself joined…

  8. Steve says:
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    I picked Loney up for my RCL team last year and he hit a home run in his first-at-bat. He will always have a place in my heart.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      The chances of you grabbing Loney and him hitting a homer immediately seem like Stevabermetrics working in reverse…

      • Steve says:
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        @Grey: Mind you, that’s all he did.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha… Of course it was… You could’ve owned him all year and he wouldn’t have done much… BTW, you see the Subscribe to Comments?

          • Steve says:
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            @Grey: I did, and I am :-)

  9. L-Boogie says:
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    I hated the “More” click yesterday. I don’t hate it so much today. Tomorrow I will probably love it. What can I say? I fear change but I adapt easily.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      That’s what I’m hoping from the most passionate ones against it…

  10. David_KOA says:
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    @Grey,
    Over at couchmanagers they are having a industry early season mock draft. It’s 12 teams 2 catchers, 5 OF, 5 SP & 2 RP must start. They have not said what type of scoring but I am assuming its atleast standard 5*5

    Here is how the fest round broke down
    1.) M. Cabrera
    2.) R. Braun
    3.) M. Trout
    4.) R. Cano
    5.) A. Pujols
    6.) J. Votto
    7.) M. Kemp
    8.) A. McCutchen
    9.) B. Posey
    10.) P. Fielder
    11.) G. Stanton
    12.) A. Beltre

    What are your thoughts on how it played out? Any surprises good or bad?

    • SwaggerJackers says:
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      @David_KOA: Posey that high is a surprise. Waaaaay too early if you ask me.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Posey’s insane in the first round… Any catcher is… Beltre’s silly too…

      • David_KOA says:
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        @Grey:
        The people who are drafting can vote good or bad on each pick. In the first round no pick received more bad picks then G. Stanton with five. Prince and Buster each received three and Beltre and Pujols tied with two.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Stanton could’ve been had in the 2nd round, but Beltre as a 1st round pick seems like someone’s just not sure who to draft in the 1st round…

  11. Jef says:
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    Kudos for the changes, Grey. I’ve been around the interludes long enough to know that sooner than any regular readers realize, they won’t even remember the old format. But that being said…to pile on the “more button” comments, are you familiar with the open/close format that Andrew Sullivan’s site uses for articles on the Daily Dish? That might be a solution. Unless it’s about moar page hits. Then I say “god bless capitalism.”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks for the kind words! I wasn’t aware of the Open/Close thing like on The Daily Beast, but I think that’s a huge change on the backend… It is about the more page hits, because that allowed me to cut all the ads in half per page… So revenue isn’t changing but the page is loading faster…

      • Jef says:
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        @Grey:
        Then to appease the purists, may I suggest that in your next post you crowbar in a tutorial on how to use the ‘right click-open in new tab’ feature :) good luck!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha… Will do!

  12. Arbinator says:
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    The thing that makes the Sox’ signing of Napoli a good one is how he fits into their future plans. He doesn’t. The entire Red Sox strategy is to be good in 3 years while not alienating their fanbase in the meantime so this move helps them be marginally competitive this year without losing their 2nd round draft pick, trading away prospects or saddling the team with a 4+ year contract. This fits perfectly with there other massively mediocre, relatively short term signings like Ross, Gomes, and now Victorino. It’s also why we aren’t likely to touch Greinke, Hamilton or Anibal unless somehow they drop into the three year contract zone which they won’t.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Yeah, agreed… They’re not looking to contend, unless they happen to by July then they might buy some trade deadline guys…

  13. ATrain says:
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    Grey, dude, you’re the funniest damn roto writer around bar none. Good insight too, but that wit… rofl.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks for the kind words!

  14. HKevo says:
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    Sup Grey!
    Lovin’ the new site! I just have a quick keeper question for you. Also thanks for all your help this past season, this team was the 2012 champion due in large part to Razzball’s infinite wisdom.
    Yahoo 12 team, 6×6 ROTO, 5 keepers
    No brainers keepers:
    1. Swiggy Cabrera
    2. Braun
    3. Beltre
    Possible Keepers:
    1. Kipnis
    2. Halladay
    3. Goldschmidt
    4. Carlos Santana
    If I were to only keep 3 players, I’d start drafting in the fourth round next year.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks for the kind words! I’d keep Carlos and Kipnis, unless you have a corner slot, then I’d keep Goldy and Carlos… Or if there’s someone who’s getting thrown back in that’s better that you know about prior…

  15. Tom says:
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    Excellent job on the site refresh!
    It looks great!
    Are you taking keeper questions yet?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks! Yeah, I’ll take keeper questions… Shoot…

  16. beardcrabs says:
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    is anyone doing slow drafts on couchmanagers… if so, let me know…

  17. Awesomus Maximus

    Awesomus Maximus says:
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    New look is tits, and the functionality is very nice, as well.

    Had a dream last night that I was Mike Trout and playing in the World Series… only problem is that you (Grey) were my manager and you were batting me ninth! I ran to the concession stand in the 1st to grab a fountain soda and on my way back, I bumped into Adam Dunn (we were all on the Nationals) while he was rounding 3rd, causing him to get thrown out… and we ended up losing by 1 run. Later on, at the team hotel, a hot young groupie offered me anal to get my mind off of the blunder.

    Least believable part of the dream? I’m going with Big Donkey rounding third and heading for home.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks! Least believable thing is you as Mike Trout were batting ninth… What, I was trying to turn over the lineup? Was Dunn batting leadoff? Am I Dusty Baker?

      • Awesomus Maximus

        Awesomus Maximus says:
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        @Grey: You gave me some talk about having to prove myself in the postseason… that part’s hazy. What I do remember is that you were in black and white, just like your avatar. I found that pretty amusing.

        You caught up on Survivor? Who you got going home tonight?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          My avatar is actual size… I’m caught up on Survivor… I think it’s going to stay Lisa, Skulpin, Malcolm and The Sparky Anklebiter Therapist… So, it’ll leave Carter or Crazy Brazilian and CB’s definitely going home if she doesn’t win immunity… Feels like the most obvious one all year… Of course that’ll mean a switch up…

          • Awesomus Maximus

            Awesomus Maximus says:
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            @Grey: Yeah, I liked Crazy’s desperate play last week, but the fact that they showed no footage of people discussing a possible new immunity idol makes me think no one bought her story (and they don’t want to show people NOT buying her story, because that eliminates drama). If they did buy her story, it could end up being one of the more genius plays in show history.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, no one bought that story… I liked how she ripped up the note and made a point of telling Probst she can’t tell everything on the note… No tip of the hand there that she’s trying really hard to lie… Crazy’s clock is getting punched tonight…

              • Awesomus Maximus

                Awesomus Maximus says:
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                @Grey: I look forward to her jury question/rant, but I can’t take her on the show anymore. I enjoy a good villain, but she’s more annoying and less interesting than even what’s his name (Colton?) from the men vs. women season.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Colton entertained me… This girl doesn’t entertain me at all except when she’s walking back and forth in her bikini… She reminds me of people that just don’t understand how others are responding to what they say or do and those people annoy me too… I much prefer a villain who owns their villainous behavior…

                  • Awesomus Maximus

                    Awesomus Maximus says:
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                    @Grey: Colton was entertaining for a while, but I remember him getting very whiny and hurtful when it served no purpose… maybe even racist? He did/said something that was pretty offensive, I think.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Oh, that’s right! He said the black guy and him wouldn’t be friends and the only people that looked like him were his maid and stand-up comedy isn’t a real job… I gotta say he was more entertaining than the stand-up, which isn’t a great sign…

  18. JoeC says:
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    “The catching market this offseason is about as exciting as watching a Casey Affleck starring vehicle.”

    You didn’t like “The Killer Inside Me”? It was pretty brutal, but I thought Affleck did a good job. Of course, Jessica Alba… mmmmbbbbbb… my tongue just went numb!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha… You mean… Mmmboob…

Comments are closed.