I hate these stupid beyotchabatukises too. No love lost here! Though I’m not sure if that means you love someone or you hate them. I’m trying to think the last time I heard someone say no love lost and if they were saying it happily or angrily. I think it was angrily, but they might have had no idea what they were talking about either. Well, with love lost or not, I still want a 3rd baseman earlier on. I’d prefer to not have to take a flyer from these schmohawks. Though they are different levels of schmo-ness. Some are definitely less schmo-y. As mentioned in my 2nd basemen to target or was it 1st basemen to target or catchers to target, in one of those I mentioned how if a position is deep I want a top guy unless it’s pitchers. Yeah, if the position is shallow, I don’t want a flyer. I’d prefer to have a flyer where most have flyers. This is contrary to popular opinion; maybe I’ll win a Pulitzer for this shizz. Speaking of Pulitzers, I had dinner recently with someone who won a Pulitzer. I can’t even spell Pulitzer without the spellchecker. Anyone who can spell it, should win it. They only mentioned their Pulitzer three times over the course of two hours. I would’ve been wearing the Pulitzer medallion around my neck (is it a medallion?). I would put my name in to a restaurant hostess as “Pulitzer.” When a waiter came by for our drink orders, I would ask for a whiskey with a splash of Pulitzer. The Pulitzer person was now working at US Weekly. I asked if they won the Pulitzer for their Octamom coverage. They weren’t amused. This list is 3rd basemen that can be had later in your drafts. Look at this as a supplement to the top 20 3rd basemen of 2012 fantasy baseball. Where applicable, click on the players name to read more about them or to see their 2012 projections. Anyway, here’s some 3rd basemen to target for 2012 fantasy baseball:
Ian Stewart – Can you believe I didn’t write a sleeper post about Ian Stewart? Yes, I’ve written one about him for the last three years. I meant, can you believe I didn’t write one this year? You know what that means, right? This is the year he finally puts his shizz together and earns his Mini Mini Donkey brays.
Danny Valencia – I wrote a sleeper post about Valencia but I haven’t posted it yet because, frankly, I’m not sure I ever will. Just not sure how much I want to endorse him. This says a lot about Danny Valencia. Maybe I’ll post the Valencia sleeper article the same day I post my Leonys Martin sleeper post that I’m also not sure if I’m ever going to publish.
Mike Moustakas – In a whole mess of fairly uninspiring sleeper/3rd basemen to target, here’s a name that’s got me excitakas. He had a solid September last year and could shoot the rankings for next year.
Mat Gamel – I am a time traveler. True story. And I come from the future. In the future, I listened to the Brewers play-by-play of Gamel playing first. It went like this. “That’s a dribbler to first to end the inning… Ooh, got through the ol’ wickets. Gamel chases the ball up the line… Grabs it and throws the ball into the stands? Hmm… He was facing the wrong way. Mistake anyone could make. Now he’s going into the stands to retrieve the ball… Batter is rounding home, Gamel grabs… What I believe is a soda, nachos combo… And throws it home! Ooh, runner is in just under the tag with the umpire screaming, ‘That’s nacho ball!'”
Lonnie Chisenhall – The Indians should have a Chiz in the Hall day where all fans dressed in drag get in free. I just thought of that, but you can have it Indians marketing team, it’s yours. Right now, Asdrubal is penciled into the three hole. Luckily, they’re using pencil cause I don’t think that stays. Asdrubal will move up, Choo will move up, Sizemore will retire, Kipnis will move down, Santana will stay where he is, which leaves Chisenhall batting… Hmm, I have no idea. I just got totally confused. He’ll probably start the season at the bottom of the order, but move up to fifth or sixth by May.
Pedro Alvarez – I think the Pirates give Alvarez every opportunity to succeed, which is not to say he will. If he does start at 3rd, he still has a dirty/ugly/synonym K-rate and could provide a lot of nothing, which, according to Aristotle, is but a receptacle in which objects of matter can be placed. One object that could be placed there is McGehee (but if he’s playing 3rd base, he really should go by M.C. Gehee).